Recently I made a promise to myself, which I have done time and time again. In the past, I’ve promised to eat better. To read more. To write more. To stop cussing. To exercise more. I even promised to stop hitting snooze. Well, I still love to eat ice cream, I’m sore each time I exercise, I cuss like a sailor and hit snooze 4 out of 5 days a week.
However, if I promise my daughters or my husband or my mother I will do something, I will break my leg before I break my word to them. I am uncomfortable disappointing other people.
I decided I am tired of breaking my word to myself. I deserve the benefit of keeping my promises. I promised to stop disappointing me.
I am a therapist. I know the benefits of self-care. I preach the benefits of self-care (please refer to ANY one of my posts).
When feeling overwhelmed the last few weeks with quarantine, working from home, working in isolation at the office, debating the benefits of in-person-vs-home school and how to keep my sanity, I realized I was not practicing what I preached and reached out for some help.
I did not find the key to happiness, a secret code or a magic pill, but I did find some peace. I began practicing daily meditation to take better care of myself.
I know the research to support the benefits of meditation – I quote them daily to my clients. I did not need a reason to believe this would benefit me. I only needed to promise not to disappointment myself by making me a priority.
While I would love a weekly trip to the spa for a day full of pampering, that is not in the cards for this working momma. What I can commit to is 6-10 minutes per day where I am present in my life (sounds hippy-dippy right? bare with me).
When I am present, I am not time traveling back to the laundry list of shit I didn’t get finished yesterday and I am not jumping into what waits for me tomorrow. I am only focused on how my feet feel in this very moment. What I found was a peaceful heart, a still mind and a grateful human. I found me – not employee, not mother, not wife, not daughter, not friend, feminist, therapist, writer – just me in a moment that I can be proud of. My soul needed that and I look forward to it everyday.
I do not sit with my legs crossed while I empty my mind. I may have to fight for those tiny minutes to find the balance I crave, but I made a promise to myself and am no longer willing to break promises to me. I carve out my 6-10 minutes EVERY. SINGLE. DAY and it saves my life every single time I do because I am worth not disappointing.
What promise will you keep to yourself? 👑🧡
Stay tuned for more on what meditations I love and how I carve out 6-10 minutes in my day.